• Montriel V. Jamari

Relationship Expert Shares 3 Dynamic Tips to Improve Communication

Do you want to improve the way that you and your partner communicate with each other? Do you want to gain greater intimacy within your relationship? Here are three simple and effective ways of improving your communication and effective listening skills within your relationships.

Did you know that we spend that we spend a considerable amount of time communicating with others through out our day? Some experts say that women use more than 10,000 words a day while men typically use about 7,000 words a day! I do not believe that these stats include the amount of time what we spend writing and responding to text messages. I would like to share with you three ways of improving your communication.

Listening is Everything!

Put your empathic hat on! It’s time to pay attention and really tune into to your partners feelings. Further, it’s crucial to maintain and continue with empathy throughout the relationship. This is a tool you’ll want to use consistently. The definition of empathy is being able to understand and feel what the other person is feeling is feeling at the moment. It is important not to attempt to solve the problem or to trap yourself in advice giving. Instead, challenge yourself to just sit and be in the moment with the person that is in front of you. Make it a point to really hear them.

Be Neutral in Your Communication

Be mindful of taking on a nonjudgmental stance when you’re communicating with your partner. Distancing yourself from judgement in the beginning of a disagreement does take practice. However, this will save you on speaking out prematurely. Do you remember what it felt like when you were judged by someone? Do you remember the shame and anger you felt as they gave you their personal opinion of you before being completely understood? Instead, consider going into the conversation as an open tablet. Practice removing yourself from personal opinion in the beginning and then slowly share your thoughts as you have gained a greater understanding of their position.

Allow Yourself to Just Be, First

Finally, think before acting. This may seem like a very simple thing to do. We may have heard this from our elementary school teachers or our parents when we were children but when it comes to practicing thinking before acting in our relationships we tend to act first. The wonderful thing about thinking before acting is that it gives your partner that feeling that they are truly being respected and that you have a sense of control. This also helps us not to jump to early conclusions and to regret something we may have said in anger or without listening to the whole story. Take a few breaths. Take some time to yourself. Free your mind of negative feelings of anger and enjoy the moments that you have with the person that you love!

Effective communication in relationships is one the hardest things, at times, to do. Your success is determined by employing a few powerful tools and consistently using them. Questions? Give me a call! I'm here to help.